Be ready to direct them to a treatment program you think may be a good fit or to online resources. There is a wealth of information about recovery, and it can be overwhelming to decide where to start in the early stages of sobriety. If you can make that task a little more manageable, your loved one is more likely to take advantage of the work you’ve put into their well-being.

If you are concerned that your parent may have a problem with alcoholism, you might be terrified to bring it up to them. You might fear them getting angry, yelling at you, or getting violent. You may feel they will make a scene in front of others, embarrass you, move out, or either use more or more secretly. These are all things that have happened to others, but they don’t have to happen to you. Included below are a list of guidelines that may help you improve the outcome of any conversation with your parent.

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Be ready to offer these up as examples when having a conversation with your loved ones. If you say you are concerned but have no solid reasoning, your loved one isn’t likely to take you seriously. Often they struggle with depression or anxiety and drink as a way to self-medicate. It is important to acknowledge that you think there may be an underlying mental health issue that results in drinking. Try not to sound accusatory, especially if the person may not know they suffer from depression or anxiety. Instead, ask them gently if they think there could be a contributing cause to their drinking.

  • If your loved one is struggling with addiction but refuses treatment, you might feel helpless, scared, and frustrated.
  • Hope and a solid plan of action are a powerful combination.
  • Someone with AUD may be resistant to seeking professional help.
  • Understanding that an alcoholic is a different animal than just someone who likes to drink often is an important distinction to understand.
  • Preparing and anticipating questions will help you make the most of your appointment time.

This statistic was published in a study by the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism in 2015, but every year, the alcoholism rate in America continues to rise. Living with a functioning alcoholic can be stressful-not just for the alcoholic in denial but also for the family and friends of alcoholics. We’ve composed this list to provide a helpful guide that will sketch out a path for recovery, not just for the addict, themselves, but also for their friends and family.

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As much as you love the person with the drinking problem and as upsetting as it can be to watch them struggle with their addiction, there’s only so much you can do. You can’t monitor their behavior around the clock, make all their decisions for them, or allow their problems to take over your life. You are not your loved one’s therapist or AA mentor, so don’t try to take on those responsibilities. To avoid burnout, set clear limits on what you’re able to do. The emotional impact of helping a loved one stay sober can take a toll.

The longer people allow their use to continue, the longer they will take advantage of that fact. Enabling can also mean doing things for an addict that they are plenty capable of doing themselves. Part of recovery and sobriety is learning how to be self-sufficient, a skill that will never be refined if someone continues taking on an addict’s responsibilities. Sobriety and recovery will seem a lot less daunting if they have a starting point.

Care at Mayo Clinic

They may not be in control of their own decision making. No alcoholic—no person, period—wants to feel talked down to or shamed. It might seem like an effective strategy for reaching them, but it isn’t.

Is it wrong to leave an alcoholic?

There is no right or wrong answer when it comes to leaving a relationship with someone experiencing alcohol use.

By Buddy T

Buddy T is a writer and founding member of the Online Al-Anon Outreach Committee with decades of experience writing about alcoholism. Because he is a member of a support group that stresses the importance of anonymity at the public level, he does not use his photograph or his real name on this website. Natural consequences may mean that you refuse to spend any time with the person dependent on alcohol. What might seem like a reasonable expectation in some circumstances might be totally unreasonable when it comes to someone with an addiction.

Depending on the severity of the AUD, individuals can enter into a number of alcohol rehabilitation programs including inpatient and outpatient addiction treatment settings. If they’re ready to seek alcohol help and treatment, you may want to start thinking about how you will cover the cost of rehab. The cost of a treatment program for alcoholism sober house can vary widely, depending on the type of program and your insurance coverage. Because treatment costs can differ, you want to make sure the program you enroll your loved one in will actually work. Dealing with a loved one’s alcohol problem can feel like an emotional rollercoaster and take a heavy toll on your health, outlook, and wellbeing.

  • The major desire of anyone who loves an addict is to see them clean and sober.
  • Jellinek viewed alcohol addiction as a chronic relapsing condition that needed to be treated by health professionals and developed a theory on the progression of the disease through various stages.
  • Take an honest look at how often and how much you drink.

Your city’s local Alcoholics Anonymous central office can help coordinate it. Google “Alcoholics Anonymous + your city” to find their contact information. That’s where you’ll also find a list of local meetings. But sometimes the best resource for the still-drinking alcoholic is a sober person from their own life. An old drinking buddy who found recovery or a sober aunt or uncle they admire and respect can sometimes accomplish in an hour what you’ve been trying to do for years.

Ask for concrete commitments and then follow up on them. In 2009, only 2.6 million of the 23.5 million people who abused drugs and alcohol received treatment, according to… One way to help an alcoholic friend is staging an intervention. When many people think of interventions, they envision something confrontational — but that does not have to be the case. An intervention aims to show someone why they need to get into a Recovery program.

how to help an alcoholic